Personal Essays

Between Death and Goodbye

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Before my wife's body was taken away — and her final organs harvested — I was able to spend a few precious moments with the woman I loved.

Fighting White Privilege, Grieving My White Mother

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The problems with international adoption are many. But I cannot reject the mother who raised me — especially in her absence.

The Words We Couldn’t Say

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As my daughter grew inside of me, my best friend's pregnancy ended in stillbirth. Comforting her felt impossible.

Home, Not Home

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After my brother died suddenly, everything about my hometown felt all wrong — until it didn't.

Living a Year as if It Were My Last

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As my childhood friend was dying of cancer, I embarked on a 365-day experiment in living.

Letter of Last Resort

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Had I unknowingly destroyed my father's suicide note all those years ago?

Not So ‘Crazy,’ After All

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How my sister’s cancer death changed the way I approach my own health care choices.

Dorm-Room Mourning

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After my mom's death, my dorm room was an embarrassing place for grief.

What Mom Would Have Thought of the Kardashian Clan

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I missed my mother at my wedding, and at the birth of my children. But the real reason I wish she was still here is to discuss reality TV with me.

From a Distance

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Sixteen years after my brother’s suicide, keeping his memory alive finally feels less a burden — and more a privilege.

My Father, Myself

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On the anniversary of Dad’s death, I honored him by spending a leisurely day, uncharacteristically, alone.

Mourning the Dad Who Walked Out on Me

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My dad walked out on me when I was nine. All grown up, I decided to find him — only to find out he was dead. Here's how I mourned.

Those Final Moments

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When I think about my mom, much of the time I recall not her life, but her horrific death while on an island vacation.

A Race Against Time

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Throughout my daughter's illness — and in the aftermath of her death — my treadmill has been a loyal companion.

From My Inbox, a Grim Reminder

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The school district emailed to remind me about kindergarten registration. The thing is, my younger daughter died two years ago.

Gold Star Widow

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At my first Memorial Day conference for military families, I found kindred spirits among the brokenhearted.

Forever ‘The Girls’

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After my husband died, my best girlfriends didn’t know what to say to me. But their presence that Memorial Day was more important than their words.

Mayday on a May Day

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Approaching the fourth anniversary of my husband’s death, my one constant was not knowing exactly how I’d get through it.

Last Call in the ‘Land of What If’

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After the man I was falling in love with died by suicide, I spent a year dating a ghost.

To Be a Motherless Mother on Mother’s Day

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Five years after my mom’s sudden death, the birth of my son returned to me something I had been missing.

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