Father Loss

‘Don’t Forget This Happened’

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A COVID-era plea on World AIDS Day

Saying Kaddish Into the Screen

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After my father died, a weekly memorial gathering connected me to community when I needed it most. Then came COVID.

My Little Fictions Legacy

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Dad applied his gifts for narrative to everything from pornography to children's stories. One of those brought my son and him together after he died.

‘The Only Way Out Is Through’

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I was 18 when my dad died and not one member of my supportive South Asian network recommended therapy. Here's why they should have.

‘Your Papa Is Right Here’

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After my husband died, an old friend asked me what he could offer me, beyond words. I thought of something that our young sons could treasure.

My Father’s Death Changed the Way I Think About Time

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I was always running minutes, even hours, behind. Not anymore.

Are You There Dad? It’s Me, Samantha.

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Two years after my father's mysterious death, I'm finally embracing his life lessons as a way to live mine.

A Missing Gravestone in the ‘Garden of Fairies’

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We went to the cemetery to visit dad — only to find out what wasn’t there.

What My Grief Feels Like: An Illustrated Guide

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It changes your body, sometimes in ways you can see and always in ways you can't.

We Held a Fake Wedding So My Dying Dad Could Be There

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Bridal magazines don’t really cover these unglamorous issues.

Forgiveness, Father’s Day and Finding a Way Though

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I screwed up my dad's birthday a long time ago. His reaction continues to teach me lessons years after his death.

The Myth of Protecting People from Suffering

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When we try to shield people from pain in an effort to not break their hearts, we end up doing just the opposite.

Important Guidelines for Large Adult Orphans

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On the one hand, you must become both parent and child; on the other, you may request to to be flown to Rome for a pasta dinner.

‘My Death Stories Are My Birth Stories’

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That precious, precarious, otherworldly state of giving birth reminded me of something else: grief.

Don’t Talk About How ‘It Gets Better’

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This is what I wish my friends knew when my parents died.

When You’re Everyone’s Favorite Grief Doula

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The first of my friends to lose a parent, I stand at the ready welcoming others into the club no one wants to join.

‘Querida Amor’

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My father was scary to me except on Valentine’s Day. When he died, those treacly annual expressions of fatherly love went with him.

Manhattan skyline - Modern Loss

Welcome to New York

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Suddenly worth half a million dollars through the dumb luck of my dad's death, I rooted myself to a new and unfamiliar home.

A Year of Grief, 15 Seconds at a Time

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After my dad's murder, Instagram served as both my grief counselor and a surprising professional outlet.

Grief Bacon: Breastfeeding Through My Grief

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After Dad died, my body felt numb, but my breasts soldiered on.

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