Child Loss

Surviving the Agony of Anticipation

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As I see the world sink into the abyss amid the coronavirus pandemic, I recall the first days after my daughter Talia’s terminal diagnosis.

You ‘Can’t Imagine’? Well, Neither Can I.

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People say a lot of useless shit to grieving people. Here's how to do better.

Laundry, Before and After

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I used to resent the endless sorting, washing and folding. Then my daughter got sick — and everything changed.

Seeing My Daughter in Other People

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After she died, I was captivated by those who looked like her.

Masks - Modern Loss

Grief Bacon: The Masks I Wear

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My child's cancer diagnosis abruptly halted reflection on my own post-cancer body and soul. But after he died, it came roaring back.

Traveling the World With My Daughter’s Ashes in Tow

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In Ireland, alongside an empathic stranger, I watched Rachel's cremains scatter with the wind. 

Screening Calls for My Dead Son

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‘Sorry, he’s not here.’ You have no idea how sorry I am Eric’s not here.

Built for Two, But Minus One

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Grief is one of the deep intimacies of our marriage. Our tandem riding reflects that.

6 Tips for Talking to Kids About Death

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We can’t gloss over the topic without denying a fundamental part of our lives and our family. Here’s how we navigate the conversation.  

My Grief is F*cking Funny

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Why I never pass up a chance to laugh my ass off. Especially when I'm grieving.

The Ugliest Side of Grief

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Jealousy is already a tough emotion to grapple with. Pairing it with a stillbirth brings out a whole new monster.

Writing With Heart From Behind Bars

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I teach memoir writing at a prison. One week, the topic was loss. My students really went there — and so did I.

After a Teenager’s Death, Metaphors Fail

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My friend's 16-year-old daughter was hit by a car and I struggled to write about it. Because no words can truly encapsulate the zero of grief.

What This Mother Told Her Dying Son

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Her words were perfect.

Sewing - Modern Loss

The Sewing Blogs Were My Salvation

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After my baby died, I didn’t know what to do with my hands. But then I found the sewing blogs.

‘I’m Not Done Being Your Mom’

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My son is gone, but our relationship — surprisingly — continues to evolve.

What I Tell My Kids About Their Brother Who Died Before They Were Born

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Even in Seamus' absence, our four-person household continues to feel to us like a family of five.

The Billy Joel Concert That Saved Me

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By taking me to that show, what remained of my family in the aftermath of my son’s suicide was telling me, ‘Please come back to us. We still need you.’

The Hummingbirds Who Lightened My Grief

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When my daughter died, I hated the sun for rising without her. I wept as the world turned green and flowers burst open. But the backyard birds were a different story.

Maia drawings Modern Loss

Mentee, Interrupted

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Maia and I only spent a few minutes together. It was only after her death that I finally got to know her.

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