Personal Essays

Maia drawings Modern Loss

Mentee, Interrupted

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Maia and I only spent a few minutes together. It was only after her death that I finally got to know her.

Sautéing My Way Through Grief

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When my best friend died in a car accident, I felt compelled to take up cooking. Here are three recipes that helped me through.

Dead in Real Life, Alive on Twitter

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How a post-mortem scrapbook project kept teaching me about my friend.

In Defense of Magic

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The winter holiday rituals have soothed our grieving souls. So has our son's belief in Santa.

I’m Done Hanging Stockings for Dead People

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For the past 7 years, holiday decorations reminded me only of who was missing. This year, I said ‘enough.’

Both Parents Are Gone. But I Miss Only One of Them.

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When I long to pick up the phone — and share my joys and my struggles — I only want to speak to Mom.

Trying to Get Pregnant After the Death of a Child

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After losing my six-year-old son, I was determined to give my youngest child another sibling.

Ned and I

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I'm 36. One of my best friends is 84. I try to live in the moment, knowing our relationship might be a fleeting one.

The Sitcom Widow

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Sizing myself up to DJ Tanner, Carol Brady and Nancy Botwin

When Grandma Got Mean, I Got Angry

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When my spirited grandmother declined, then died, I was as pissed off as I was utterly bereft.

I’m Not Okay with Being a Motherless Mother

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Turns out, I'm not ok with being a motherless mother.

9 Funerals and a Wedding

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We had so much fun watching our wedding video, until we realized that so many of the people who toasted us that day are dead.

‘Daddy, Daddy, Where Are You?’

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After 9/11 my son asked for his father dozens of times a day, everyday — for nine years.

Cleanup in the Produce Aisle

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I was in Whole Foods when learned of my father's suicide. Going grocery shopping has never been the same.

Beyond Coincidence

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15 years after my father died suddenly, had he finally come to say goodbye?

Loss Squared In the City of Love

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After my mother's death, I departed for Paris with her ashes -- the same week of the tragic terror attacks.

Modern Loss Fathers Day

A Father’s Day Sale for the Recently Deceased Dad

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I keep getting emails from Bed Bath & Beyond reminding me that “It’s Not Too Late To Find the Perfect Father’s Day Gift!” But in this case, it kind of is.

Why I’m Jealous of Grieving People

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Dad died when I was 6, and life went on seemingly undeterred. All these years later, I find myself envious of those who have the chance to mourn.

Modern Loss Going Home

Going Home

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After my dad's death, now it just feels like a house.

Love, Dad

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On my 8th fatherless Father's Day, my dad found a way to send me a handwritten message from the grave.

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