Personal Essays

How My Dying Mom and I Learned to Meditate

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Ironically, a practice we'd always joked about brought us even closer together.

My Therapist Is No Longer a Phone Call Away

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She counseled me through my young husband's death, through raising children, blending families, and so much more. Now she's gone.

Losing My ‘Naming Rights’

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A cousin named her daughter after my mom before I could.

My Father’s Death Changed the Way I Think About Time

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I was always running minutes, even hours, behind. Not anymore.

‘At Least You’re Not Having Twins’

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As a mother of twins, responses to my latest pregnancy announcement are all over the map. But amid a private loss, one remark cuts to the bone.

2020: The Year Mom Didn’t Live To See

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We made it past Thanksgiving and Christmas. Now comes everything after.

My Bizarre Childhood Wish Showed Up in My Mom’s Cremains

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I found the one piece of her that didn't get scattered.

The Neverending Battle of Fall and Winter

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Charlotte, my daughter, was murdered at Sandy Hook. Here is how I cope during 'anniversary season.'

Are You There Dad? It’s Me, Samantha.

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Two years after my father's mysterious death, I'm finally embracing his life lessons as a way to live mine.

It’s The Worst Wonderful Time of The Year

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I'm heading into my first 'festive' seasonal stretch after my husband's death and have no clue what I'll do. Weirdly, that's ok.

Animal Husbandry for Dragons

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What if we try caring for our pain, instead of trying to control it?

A Missing Gravestone in the ‘Garden of Fairies’

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We went to the cemetery to visit dad — only to find out what wasn’t there.

I Am a ‘Tragedy Trust Funder’

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A modest surprise inheritance from my late husband allows me to raise my two young kids without having to go to work. So why do I feel so guilty about it?

Dogs Can Tell Time

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When our dog walker died by suicide, my pups missed her. So did I.

The 5 Stages of Grief: Horror Movie Edition

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My son's and mother's deaths sent me through a bizarre trajectory. I finally found my comfort in my beloved gruesome films.

That Time I Had A Pre-Funeral Beauty Supply Store Meltdown

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I went in for waterproof mascara but came out with so much more.

We Left Everything Unsaid

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When my husband got sick, we focused exclusively on hope; when he died, I was consumed with regret.

On Teaching Writing Through Grief

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I teach others how to tell their saddest stories. But when it came to my own brother’s loss, the words wouldn’t come — until they did.

Saeed Jones book excerpt, Modern Loss

I Came Out to My Family While Planning My Mother’s Funeral

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Reeling in brand-new grief, I felt more like my true self than ever before.

21 Things I Hate — and Love — About Being a Widow

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Few things in life are black and white, especially in the wake of a death.

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