Personal Essays

Meet My ‘Dead Mom Friends’ 

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I’ve found kinship (but no judgment or pity) among my friends — and even acquaintances — who have also experienced a loss of a parent. 

Why I Told Anne Lamott My Husband Died

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I promised myself I wouldn’t, but then I opened up to a writer I’ve long admired about the most surreal, unbelievable thing that has ever happened to me.  

When My Husband Died, Facebook Became My Boyfriend

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Some people see social media as a trigger during times of great suffering. But after my husband died, it helped me stay afloat amid my grief.

What I Still Can’t Do

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Ten months after my sister’s death, I can laugh and smile. I can sometimes care about other people’s problems. I can’t listen to voicemails or write thank you notes or stop waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Grieving in a Broken Body

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I was badly injured in the accident that killed my mother. Never was I more at peace with her death than in those six months between the funeral and when I started walking again.

Built for Two, But Minus One

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Grief is one of the deep intimacies of our marriage. Our tandem riding reflects that.

The Un-Telling

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I shared our pregnancy news early — asserting that I wanted my community with me in joy, but also in potential sorrow. Now that I had miscarried, there were so many calls to make.

How I Rediscovered My Professional Drive After a Stillbirth

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For “The Americans” costume designer, returning to work turned out to mean more than just punching the clock

How I Make Real Mom Friends After My Baby’s Death

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Bitching about parenthood anchors me to the present — and tests the waters for true connection.

Dude, Where’s My Grief?

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One guy’s journey through the murky territory of loss, and the map it has left behind.

My Childhood’s Signature Scent

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The smell of tobacco brings my late father — and his favorite vice — back into my airspace.

The Clenching Curse

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Those hips don't lie. Even in grief.

That Could Have Been Us

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It can be painful to see people so obviously in love when I’m breaking inside, but it’s not other young couples that make me fall apart.

My Grief is F*cking Funny

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Why I never pass up a chance to laugh my ass off. Especially when I'm grieving.

I Was the One Who Made It

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My mom lost two babies before I was born. Sometimes it felt like I was living for all three of us.

The Ugliest Side of Grief

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Jealousy is already a tough emotion to grapple with. Pairing it with a stillbirth brings out a whole new monster.

Take a Chance On Me

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Two days after my mom’s funeral, her friend Velma told me she had a surprise for me — and OMG, did she ever.  

The Show Must Go On

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My mom’s life went dark after cancer won out. But it didn’t mean my beloved theater-going had to as well.

Mother Loss and My Lyft Driver

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I had a five star ride -- but not for the reasons I'd expected.

It’s Hard To Rattle the Dead, But I’m Trying

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Aunt Sherrie died by suicide, leaving me her best leather boots and a Barbie collection for the ages. If only she could see those things now.

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